sianx..

mood: yawnx
weather: |||||
song now: hui dao guo qu

nian chu 3

as usual.. nothing much.. found a couple of frenz to around.. met martin first at ps.. den arcade.. den fund came with his orangee speed machine.. drove us to jurong point.. spent lotz of time there at the arcade again.. den.. whoa.. kan u bliff it.. arcade all dae... okok.. nvm.. den sped off to beauty world there to pick up fer.. wanted to go yuhan's house to visit her parents bai nian one.. haha.. didnt.. heard in the baqgrd her mum quite pissed.. tho she msg later to say that in fact her mum wasnt.. but well.. heez.. den went to ben ben hse bai nian and spent the remaining hrs of the dae at his house.. till evryone got knocked out.. welll. luckily for fer, he initiated and literally whack us up that we haf no choice but to go home.. haha.. wadeva huh..~ then fund sent us home one by one.. 'cept for me he dropped me off at bpp cuz i told him so.. can see he's quite shack liao.. so might as well take a cab home..

my worst cab ride ever..

i have been taking cab for so long.. and none beats this one..

this uncle.. obviously from my tone, my body language, my attitude, that i dEsPeRaTeLy needs sleep.. but he juz kept rambling on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.. juz as u get pissed off reading this mine was an infinite times worse.. and of all topics, the one i heard moz, i dread moz, and of this holiday the one i wanted to avoid moz.. it is spelled a-r-m-y.. blah blah blah.. when u return.. wad rank.. xiong or not.. his thousand years ago stories (when policemen still wear shorts..) and the thing is.. why do i still bother to chat with my eyelids a quarter open? cant stand him.. as i watch the taxi fare increases with my blood pressure+anger, i was kinda glad he stopped at my hse b4 i explode.. i mean.. halo~ its 1+ close to 2 in the morning and u're telling me what i've been doing 24/7 for a year.. lyk u noe what i'm doing better than i do.. c'mon.. wake up ur idea..

after that once-in-a-lifetime encounter and seeing my bro still on his online game.. couldnt care less.. off to meet Elder Zhou..

nian chu yi

mood:sian
weather: lydat lor
song now: in the name of the father - jay chou

how do you spell boring? t-o-d-a-y

today is one of the most boring days i've ever had in my life.. trust me on that, cuz today was really a day wasted for the conservative traditon and everyone is based on the annual routine on every single thing.. the speech, the actions, the bahviour, the food, the mood, the games, the ppl, the whole world... arrgghh..

i'm not gonna bai nian tmr.. its juz so lame.. okok.. my angbao $ka-ching$ mite suffer but no way am i gonna torture myself lydat.. i mean.. its gr8 i get to spend time with my family, esp my father who has been working hard lately.. but the thing is.. hmm.. wait.. wadz the thing? precisely! wadz the thing? wadz the whole deal? damn it..

so.. after the replies i've got.. even if no one will acc me tmr.. tmr i'll 'duang' ard in town and rot myself away..

if time = money, i'll be richer than.. hmm.. anyone else.. yea.. shd be.. 'scratches head'

if one day i could turn back time, i will not hesitate, and i'll be running to you to catch ur hands when u fall, to be there when u call.. and of cuz, to love you more and more..

<3 _a broken less than 3_ <3

new skin

mood: sian
weather:
song now:

since i'm bored

might as well change a new skin..

hope new things will happen to me.. the good ones.. haha..

of cuz.. since its chinese nw year.. what does it mean? new stufz!

hey ppl.. dun worry bout me.. i'm perfectly fine..

mood: a broken less than 3
weather:
song now: buried myself alive



yesterdae-
4+ woke up.. wana puke..
5+ puke rite out of my bunk.. cleaned it up meself.. a sick man still worrying thta others might be disturbed by the fact that sum1 puked..
8+ puke again.. medic gave me sum medicine..
10+, 11+, ... puke almoz every hr.. was feeling super down.. picked up the fone.. and realised i have nobody to tell my sickness to..
2+ went to see the mo.. he put me on drip.. the moz painful injection i've taken in my life so far i think.. but still i held back my tears and smile to him assuring him that i m fine..
4+ woke up to realize the drip has finished and a pool, and really, a pool of blood beside me cuz i've been pressing onto my hand.. overheard my blood pressure was 100/40.. so is that gd or bad? got mc for 2 daes..
5+ collect medicine.. barely walked.. felt lyk i've passed out upon reaching my bunk..
7+ woke up and booked out.. on my own.. caouldnt really wake up.. luckily got sum cash on me and a taxi stopped by..
8+ still battling.. couldnt really eat.. so might as well go sleep..

today
woke up.. ate sum stufs.. then puke again.. went to see my family docotr..
12+ got an extended mc cuz he said i'm still not fit for duties yet.. got sum stronger medicine.. one of them tasted quite nice.. lyk orange powder.. sorta taste lyk the emo thingy..

finally.. ate sumthing w/o puking.. by evening i managed to eat sum solid food.. that is to mean rice and meant and veges..

so juz now.. no matter how unwell, how much my mum stopped me.. i juz ate my first choc!! haha.. now that is some kinda defiance..

sianx.. the feeling of suffering alone is very tough.. no kidding.. but there is really no single one on my fone list.. really..

anesthetized

mood:
weather:
song now:



in the midst of bitter, an aroma of swwetness rose up in ur heart..

thatz dark chocolate to me..

trust me.. it does have a great effect.. for happy moments.. it accentuate ur joy.. but as u are going thru the valleys, it does serve as anesthetic..

went out with yuhan to watch elizabethtown, den bought sumthing.. and then she went off.. kinda sian.. den called up a few ppl to ask them out.. and to my disappointment.. none can make it.. called kayan first.. one hour later then she replied she was having lunch with her mum.. then subsequently a few other ppl.. all cant.. most possible person is still having dinner.. tho i could have met him later.. i didnt..

sad huh..

hur hur..

well.. what to say? its lyk the finger thing u see.. in the end it cant be the whole world is wrong.. evaluate urself first..

isit thru that love only laz 3 months, then its feeling, then its habit..
in chinese its, ai qing san ge yue, ran hou gan qing, jie zhe she xi guan..

i wana rebuke this, but found out it is really true.. haiz..

promise me u'll never let me go

promise me..

mood: suckx
weather: rainy
song now: yi lu xiang bei

if dere's a start, dere's an end

so how? split.. sound so easy huh..

and what did one of you say? you so close to the cell meh? you really that sad to see the cell split meh? ok.. wadeva..

you dun treat me as part of you, neither will i..

so.. i think this weekend confinement for he recruits will be quite a break for me.. it shd be quite some time i'll go back.. i think..

i mean.. sum of the ppl closer to me all gone.. ppl lyk sutiean andrew shuting.. but well.. guez n'one gonna feel the same bout me.. yea.. boring

juz got nights off.. nowhere to go due to budget constraint.. wanted to juz go jec nd chill lyk b4.. but sumbody is no longer there to acc me, sit there for sum time.. juz keep quiet and watch ppl ice-skating.. nope.. no single one.. well.. kinda deprived of frenz eva since i stepped into ns.. or rather.. adulthood.. no longer all those close frenz whom i can talk to 'bout juz anything in the world.. juz listening to me blabbering on and on tho it pretty much dun make any cents and dollars..

so where am i going now.. i dunno.. business is wad others tel me.. but i have yet heard my own voice yet.. cuz till now i haven live for myself really.. living for ppl's opinion.. for ppl's acceptance.. for ppl i loved.. for ppl i dun love..

realize i got quite a convenient way of going back home from camp this evening.. from cck take lrt to petir or pending then take 171.. haha.. smart huh...

hur hur..

hmm.. too long nv blog oso forgot what i can/cannot write..

so.. am i farnie or are my speech farnie.. so.. they're laughing with me or AT me? really dun understand.. when i'm in a gd mood that is.. whenevea i talk.. its lyk, normal speech, ppl can laugh for a long time.. seriously.. am i such a joke? --.--"" happens to me with ppl i close to howeva.. ppl lyk mr. lee, fiona and qinyi(well, i think they are naturally nuts).. and.. my recruits?????? i mean.. what the?? haiz.. lemma see.. sum really lame egs that they laugh for quite long.. once i stepped in when the officer still conducting the warm-up.. then the "Speed-up" while jogging on the spot.. then i merely say one of my recruits hands are running but body jogging and legs walking.. (well i learnt it from my dad..) then i almoz made the company cannot tahan the warmup.. and what ar? so many egs.. hmm.. herman ask permission to continue(suppose to be carry on..) then i say you think wad.. playstation ar? then everyone laugh again.. even my colleague andrew?? huh?? today soon kiat leaningn on the wall.. i ask him to "help help the wall is faliing" (standard saf).. then when he ask for permission to recover i ask him to ask permission from the wall.. then when he ask i replied in a low monotonous "recover" then whole coy laugh again..

huh?? maybe its not wad i say.. muz be me.. hmm.. nex time its better to check myself first b4 i say anything.. mayb i nv zip rite? ar.. and maybe i got a rice on my face this kinda stufz lar.. or maybe.. ppl ard me are all nuts.. yea.. muz be.. heez..


What would you say if i ask you not to go to forget everyone, forget everything and start over with me would you take my hand and never let me go promise me you'll never let me go and now the stars aren't out tonight, but neither are we to look up at them why does hello feel like goodbye? these memories can't replace, these wishes I wished and dreams I chased take this broken heart and make it right
I feel like I lost everything when you're gone left remembering what it's like to have you here with me I thought you should know, you're not making this easy
I never thought I'd be the one to say please don't, well please don't leave me
I'll fall asleep tonight, 'cause that brings me closer to you