fund hse yet again.. :)

mood: yoz
weather: cold?
song now: durnoe wad song

hmMmM.. y m i here? 6+.. at hm.. really cant conc studying and got nothin to do cuz of a lousy broken-down com.. decided to ask this super nice friend aka lee fund 03s74.. den yay! can.. hahaha.. den ask fer oso.. but he say too far(?? i yishun?) so nv come lorx.. :)

anw.. today my mood was lyk shit.. cuz after wad i did the consecutive dreams doesnt stop.. and its getting.. bad? i think lar.. durnoe.. den god's word dawn upon me again.. as i rem wad was said in laz service.. dun hide, dun run, dun ignore, dun resent ur hurt.. and dun give up.. hmm.. sth is tellin me i mized sth.. but well.. till the webby by me n my bez church mate mr. lee jialiang is set up.. i not gona elaborate more.. anw.. kaleong.. u go create ok? i post with you.. cuz my com siao siao.. den cannot create.. if i managed to create one by tonite tel u again lorx.. ;p

hmm.. sth struck me real hard.. there has been signs everywhere since that session.. telling me that i shdnt run away.. but as i pray.. sum1 is tellin me again.. and enlightening me with more profound teachings that i myself could not figure out easily.. stepping out of delusion brings real happiness in hand.. i really do.. but.. i noe wad i shd do.. and to reinstate my stand. ya.. sorriex.. anw... if a decision is made.. after sum time.. with persistence.. u can overturn that decision.. jux a phone call away.. but too late.. again. the chance is forgone yet again.. kinda feel weird.. lyk sum part of my body gone.. but well.. god still loves me.. i shall praise you..

had sum ideas of after-life.. hope i can write these down sumday.. sound absurd.. but perfect sense to me. hmm..

anw.. so glad i'm not alone.. there's this friend.. so nice.. at least.. when i least expect.. i c her msg on my phone.. and u can c that wide smile :D across my face.. but den again. i'm scared.. maybe till ns i shall tink bout his again.. no use bouncing everytime.. needa change wad i m now.. bad habits are bad.. shall not make everyone's life worse..

alan.. jia you.. u can do it.. :D

hihix.. a break for a day..

mood: /_weather:
song now: in my mind ar.. the reason..

hey pplx.. jux had a gd slp jux now waiting for a com..hahaha.. hafta say sorry to my parents tho.. didnt tell them about me staying over at fund hse.. hahaha.. den i was like.. 10+.. wake up..
"h..e..l....l..o..?"
"weh.. u ji dian hui lai?"
"oh no.. sorry.. shui guo tou wang le gao shu ni wo jing wan mei hui jia.."
"ok.. bye bye.."
sorriexz.. hahaha.. i mean.. give u 2 world of ur own larx.. dun blame me k..?

hmm.. to this sum1.. sorry.. anw i was planning to haf a "cold-war" with ya.. and stop asking me wad happened after the chances for you to ask but u mized them.. really sick and tired of standin in ur shoes.. as i said.. he's beta.. or least he treats u beta.. kinda glad that u're so.. bothered? as in.. as wad i've known of you.. u couldnt be bothered alwaz.. so i tot can jux lydat.. slowly.. gradually.. leave.. anw.. true.. i nv did rem till u said them.. i went thru so much with ya.. who can be compared to rite? and the bond.. still special.. but seriously.. i'm dropping out of this game.. rem we cele after prelims ok? lurve ya.. muackx..

hmm.. prelims.. i dunno lehx.. hahaha.. kinda suckx.. so far.. gp.. er.. hahaha.. econs and chem.. er.. maths.. er.. physics prac.. er.. ok.. hahaha.. dunno wad i'm doing larx.. hahaha.. pray hard ba..

anw.. to this super nice super sweet super pretty super understanding gal.. thanx.. the thought.. jux the tot of sharing the troubles.. moved me.. really.. think i'm callin you tmr.. be prepared to ting wo lao sao le hor.. y r u so nice to me.. haix.. hope i dun sink into another illusion.. anw.. thanx thanx thanx..

i will miss you all..

mood: nostalgic
weather: cold
song now: ocean avenue - yellowcard

if i can find you now, things would get better.. we could leave this town and run forever..

hmm.. perlims coming.. cant really blog liaox.. can c rite.. so inconsistent posts.. till then i'll cya..
i miss of you all!

p1-p2>brendan, yan wei(i think), xian yu, guofeng, for being my clique in my first two yrs of pri sch.. and relieve me of my worries of sch dat beginning of my sch life..
p3-p4>qia quan, zhao yan, weiji, honggeh, still brendan, qian tai, ashraf, pramod, isaac, fazli, siyu, hai huang, noor, anson, colleen for such a wonderful past and my first blush, ayumi, azanti(??) for my same boat in shorties and nv give up, shifah for ur laughter, amanda for the performance, the quiet-clique(not so quiet after all) of laura, karboon, keshia, denise, and the pop-girls like huifang wei wei sharon, and the wonderful pursuit of meijun at my laz year.. i miss all of you soo much..

212000-still weiji!! handi, yy, alphonsus, yitwen, yanshen(??), ivan pang, eugene koh, gabriel, lionel koh, shawn saz, gky(??), dan! roger, jianwei! harris, cct, zhang hao, benny! niki! melvin, junyuan! ivan mok, raphael(??), victor ho ho ho, cedric!! jeremy!! adrain, tkb, victor lim , jason, lennard(hahah), zhongjie, benjamin, david sia! edmund, jethro and jamie!! thank you for all the memories! i miss you all! + xyz

and my fellow co members, mostly i mentioned b4 earlier.. like silly ji, cedric (dog lost in china), gabriel, zhao yan, uncle sia, benimaru..

and of cuz.. not forgetting.. you.. the one i can nv forget.. a person i've lost with juz ONE quarrel.. i miss you sooo much.. but i can never find you back.. but i'll continue missing you..

and definitely.. you.. hahaha.. u.. i lurve you sooo much.. thanx for everything.. u may not be the longest thanx i've written.. but i miss you.. really.. still can be gan mei lar.. jux dun repeat the mistake..

jc life.. rocks.. i miss sooo many ppl.. like baoli, clara, e'an, vanessa, por huay, pamela, candice, qian hui, sandie.. hahaha.. i miss going to the grand stand.. and i still think the wind there is the bez.. so strong.. and the bez thing is to go there and take a deep breath, lookin down the field.. and when michael tan comes.. run in the opposite dir.. cuz if we're there means pon.. rem those days of ponning.. the monitor of the claz persuadin all to pon.. hahaha.. ars no more le.. and pat jiao econs teacher.. his name was sum bull shit or sth lydat rite? hahaha.. and the t30 ppl.. kayan and wenxian and dao geh and geraldine.. esp u.. can walk so long and not tired.. :) t28 ppl.. jo and jamie esp.. hahaha.. oh.. den is the v v v impt ppl.. pool gang! larry my shi fu, shaowei my foreva pool partner (as in withdraw sch tog to play pool.. we started about same time.. but he more zai.. ) and dan. who alwaz listens to me.. not anymore.. but still glad.. and jo.. rem me u kayan ah chow.. the ultimate C.A.Ls.. hahaha.. i miss you peepx.. u miss me too?

sajc.. i noe not many ppl.. mozly claz n hockey.. 1st on the list! francis! my foreva bez fren (if u acknowledge).. and kaiyuan.. my foreva bez kb partner.. nice 38 tog.. hahaha.. go shopping soon yea? hehex.. vinchante! thanx for the physics and the cat high power and the many many bball 1-on-1s.. i miss those days.. and yuki.. gd spurring guy.. hahaha.. a bit crazy (2 mug u c..).. benson! pw is so huai nian.. haf sum more post mortem yea..? i will praise you.. den comes fund! er.. thank you so much for helping me during that period of time to prepare presents.. u r sooooo gd.. drive me sumwhere soonb yea.. martin! nice swimmin at ur hse.. and the spammin of instant noodles.. study hard.. laz lap.. laz 100m.. :) julian! thanx for the hockey times.. standin by me.. teachin me.. thank you! jialiang! a bit quiet but intuitively noes wadz hapenin.. hahaha.. sensitive guy.. lucky bu xiang wo.. hahaha.. den is zi en.. hahaha.. foreva bitching and scolding me vulgarities.. but its ok.. i still lurve you as my bez kbkb fren.. and diana.. altho v ah-soh.. but actually jux niao-ing her.. she quite pretty.. still can pei me watch concert oso.. soo nice of her! and yuhan.. erm.. hahaha.. thank you for alwaz being there when i needed sum1.. ya.. and clara 2! ang moh opponent.. hokkien vs ang moh.. hahaha.. laz year was damn fun.. er.. the rez is juz as soooo impt.. but ya.. too many..

hockey pplx.. like jingfeng and adrain my two beztest fren in hockey.. oh! bez is jamie! and kevin, bok, paul, marcus and so many other pplx.. hahaha. thank you.. tho i ap den out.. but nvm.. once a hocker, alwaz a hocker.. (hawker?)

sum ppl i dun even noe how i noe.. supphian(?? spelling??).. caleb.. chee.. zhen mao.. kenneth.. raphael.. melvin.. hahaha..

laz ppl i oso miss and hapy noeing them are chiki, ruying, shiqi, eileen, yinxian! grace! and those i jux so happen to forget u now.. remind me k.. hehex..

i miss you all.. ALL of you.. miss me 2?

cya after 'xamz..

:)

i miss you

mood: sian
weather: hot
song now: i miss you

Hello there, the angel from my nightmareThe shadow in the background of the morgueThe unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valleyWe can live like Jack and Sally if we want Where you can always find meWe'll have Halloween on ChristmasAnd in the night we'll wish this never endsWe'll wish this never ends(I miss you I miss you)(I miss you I miss you)Where are you and I'm so sorryI cannot sleep I cannot dream tonightI need somebody and alwaysThis sick strange darkness Comes creeping on so haunting every timeAnd as I stared I counted Webs from all the spidersCatching things and eating their insidesLike indecision to call youand hear your voice of treasonWill you come home and stop this pain tonightStop this pain tonightDon't waste your time on me you're already The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)Don't waste your time on me you're already The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)Don't waste your time on me you're already The voice inside my head (I miss you miss you)Don't waste your time on me you're already The voice inside my head (I miss you miss you)


why cant i jux get it rite.. y so hard to learn this song..
damn.

church

mood:
weather:
song now:

hmm..

today.. went for church service.. still as rocks..
and i'll sing, sing
(cuz) i love you so..
and i'll sing
because the world cant take away
your love

den went woodlands lib mug.. saw eileen.. so study together.. 1-7+pm.. not bad.. my chem is starting its engines.. tmr ji xu jia you.. hahaha.. from lipids to food storage.. tmr finishin food chem and sum revision oso.. hahaha.. tmr.. 1.food chem 2.electrochem 3.electrolysis4.reaction kinetics 5. thermochem 6. chem equilb. 7. periodicity.. c how much i can finish.. hahaha.. den tues on maths.. study on stats.. got stat test coming up soon.. hahaha..

anw.. hehex.. =x

wang ba dan

nice tokin to you..
makes me rem the past.. and rem those nice pasts.. thank you..
anw.. faith! rem..

a post

mood: heex
weather: a bit hot lar
song now: becuz u loved me - celine dion

a post: for you, you, you, you and you

first of all.. for you:
you who never fails to cheer me up.. you who are alwaz dere when i need a confidant.. you who cannot keep yourself.. you who cant stop smiling.. you who alwaz make me cant stop smiling.. you who make me see.. you who make me feel.. you who make me speak in mute and see in blindness.. can i?

den its you:
you who stand with me thruout my laz year.. you who i can alwaz look for when i jux need sum1 to be there.. altho i cant ask for much of your time now.. i'm glad you once cared so much about me.. those days laz year can no longer be present.. but your footprints stayed in my heart..

den its you:
dun really noe wad to say to you lar.. jux wana thank you for the gr8 memories.. a pleasure to meet you..

den its you:
dun worry.. have faith in yourself.. god wil answer your prayer.. trust in him.. altho she makes you worry.. trust him.. haf faith in yourself again n again..

laz not least but moz impt of all, you:
you who promise will never forsake me.. you who alwaz stood by me in adversities of the mind i faced.. you who promised to go c it together.. i'm so glad to meet you.. and you're the strength, my voice and my eyes.. wld lurve to fall head over heels for you again and again.. wld wan the past with you repeatin again and again.. you can be you and me be me.. and be under the nite sky the third time lookin up with you together.. a stupid you, and a more stupid me..

SoRrY!

mood: apologetic
weather: cold
song now: (in my head) duibuqi ......

really sorry

really so sorriex.. its all my fault.. i was too self-centred.. i bothered about myself too much.. i cared for my own feelings too much.. dat i neglected urs.. i'm sorriex.. sorry i didnt put myself in ur shoes.. cuz u aint either.. furthermore i oreadi noe u dun like that word.. but i still used it on you.. sorriex..

i seriously wasnt in a clear state of mind.. you noe why too.. the bio clock thingy.. so i was a little "unconscious" u c.. i'm so sorrie.. but my fren once told me.. if i can be bothered to be angry with sum1.. at least that sum1 still has her influence on me.. i hafta use it on you too.. if u can be bothered to be mad at me.. y not try to be in my shoes.. den c how i feel.. den u'll realize faults have their reasons too.. really.. i hope u wun get too sad or angry after dat.. i think more of the latter.. but.. hard ar.. by those signs u shown tonite i can c u're really furious.. i oso durnoe wad to say.. i regret sayin them.. sorriex.. can i take back my words.. i didnt show consideration for you itx my fault.. i dun deny it.. i really durnoe wad to do liaox.. perhaps i'm jux too childish thinkin dat u wil respond.. my fault.. damn. help..

how now? hp? not on.. hse? slpin.. arggh.. den dun wana reply.. haix.. dun think i in a rite state of mind to write either.. shd go slp.. and you noe wad time i'm waking up.. haix.. wad can i say more by sorrie..

den dao wo men xue hui fei..

mood: >.<
weather: cold
song now: ai qing zheng shu

hmm..

how long has it been? dat i got moved to tears by a tv series.. shd be like.. damn long liaox.. hey pplx.. watch xi ling men ok? channel 8.. 7pm weekdays.. but i think those who didnt watch wld moz prob cant get the gist of wth is happenin..

so bored.. hehex.. didnt wan to blog.. but decided jux write sth stupid here.. hahaha..

gb gur tny jubz v ai tnir zl oybt nqqerff gb fgbc fgrnyva tynaprf bs zr vs h jnan ybbx ng zr whk p yne ohg qvf sfs erzvaqf zr bs qr cnfg jurer jr xrcg ovbva rnpu bgure v zvff lbh fb qha gvax v ernyyl yvxr h ogh lbh fher xrrc zl zvaq bpphcvrq nygub zr yvxr ure abj whk frrz gb xrrc guvaxva bs lbh

hahaha.. after ventinf my frustrations sure help lots.. hehex..

brr..

mood: wana slp
weather: cold
song now: gui ji

cold

today tennis.. damn. i suck.. hahaha.. zi en too.. hahaha..
6-2..
hahaha.. we won the first set.. den 1-1.. den we won third set.. den 2-2.. den they win all the way.. hahaha.. their gal is gd.. no doubt.. hahaha.. their guy.. er.. hahaha.. can say is i vs the gal lar.. too bad i too lousy.. hahaha.. a bit disappointed tho. :(

yu jian

p.s ur reassurance cant set all my worries for you away.. so i can jux hope u'll perk up soon.. and i'll pray for you.. and pray for us.. in the coming exams, future endeavours and many many other things.. gbu..

cun zai

durnoe wad to write.. maybe dedicate this ltr part of a post to sum1..

erm.. i durnoe la.. but my spirits heightened wheneva i caught sight of you.. you made me so disappointed and inferior at so many many times.. but the sight of you.. made me so happy.. if this sound like i like you..er.. not the case.. but sure.. ur presence made my day a little beta.. occasional company from you rocks.. altho now becuz of sum1 i'm forced to... but the smile from ur face is enuff to sustain my hope for the day.. dun be afraid to look at me in the eye.. dun look away when i look at you.. smile like you alwaz did when u saw me.. dun worry.. no chemistry.. but jux wana tel u.. u r so impt in my life.. i'm so glad i met you.. and i hope to meet you again and again in my life.. :)

here without you

yawnx.. when i start blogging i jux cant stop.. rite opposite of my fren who blog for the sake of blogging.. hahaha.. i mean.. maybe my typing skills too zai ba.. hahaha.. so can immediately write wadeva i'm thinkin noww.. hahahhaa.. tho sumtimes between sentences i may ponder upon the content.. hahaha.. hmm.. gonna practise guitar.. a gift from god.. to be able to play it well.. so in d.r.e.a.m.. the m.. mastery.. i shall further improve my skills.. so as to serve u lord.. and hope i can join the ministry for the music one.. for i wana be of service to you lord.. and still be enjoying the talents, gifts u bestowed upon me..

happy n sad - miriam yeung canto song

hehehz.. dun feel like stoppin.. my bro jux went back to camp after a day mc.. hmm.. take care bro.. life's tough in ns.. hold it.. persevere.. may the power of god be with you to endure this arduous journey.. give u a smile on the face after everything..

heng xing de heng xin

so bored.. this song is so nice.. hahaha.. tmr jay chou's qi li xiang coming out! hahaha.. mz buy.. rem dat time i first heard this song i was addicted to it.. (wah damn pain.. blasting the earphones .. eardrum bursting.. cz this song too touching..) the holy spirit keep workin in me.. maybe its tellin me to believe.. to persevere.. but i'm too tired.. na bu hui shi wo, bu hui shi wo.. hmm.. hmm.. qi li xiang.. i alwaz tune in to 933 jx to catch every possible broadcast of this song.. hahaha.. it rocks.. hehehxz.. hmm.. wad song gonna be next..?

lang hua yi duo duo - ah niu version

hahaha... rem i sang this song to sum1.. but cant rem who.. hahahaha.. singing along now.. hahahah.. wo men hui man man zhang da........wo zhi dao you yi tian, ah ni! yi ding hui ai shang wo... hahahaha.. i lurve this song.. hehex.. thanx to vincent.. oh! vincent.. hahaha.. today celebratin his bdae.. hahaha.. smash his face like hell.. i oso kana facial.. hahaha.. den stupid vincent only dio me.. wah biang.. mux c the video.. hahaha.. so farnie.. me n yuqi main culprit in smashin his face.. hahaha.. cute chante.. the claz lurves you! hahaha.. hmm.. wadz next..?

perfect

hmm.. reall like this song.. second to the reason.. in english songs.. hahaha.. as in like lar.. those got meanings and sentimental one is another category.. hahaha.. this song v nice cuz can sing loudly with it.. and i really agree with the song.. and we cant go back.. hahaha.. yawnx.. lemme enjoy this song..

love me - collin raye

hey.. i jux learnt the guitar song version.. hahahha.. quite hard.. c, g/b, am, am/7, f, g, c.. the first seven.. hahaha.. first time i encounter this song is at cj lt.. saw the lyrics on the table.. (vandalism lar..) den felt so nice.. and copied it down. hahaha.. hmm.. if i can eva lurve sum1 so deep like the granddpa.. my life wldnt feel so empty ba.. haix.. so bored.. 8.38.. still going.. yawnx.. forget it.. stop here..

tomorrow going for ns thingy.. aggravated my left ankle.. sprained me rite.. muscle aches.. hmm.. guex i need lotsa good luck tmr.. hehehex.. hope its sum slack unit.. heeheex..

today's service..

mood: ok
weather: a lil cold
song now: lang hua yi duo duo

how many can i save?

today's service was gr8.. gr8-est thanx to shuting for askin me down.. a youth session sure is lively.. and got two songs is so nice..

you are magnificent, eternally, wonderful, glorious..

and i sing, sing..

durnoe y so nice oso.. these two songs.. and the jumping ard.. hehex.. and the talkin to neighbours.. oh.. today is rev. mike connell holding the session. he's simply gr8.. oh.. today got the extra of the casting of the demons.. it is so real it spooks me.. and the relevant experiences shared by howard makes me ponder upon it even more.. oo.. i was supposed to go down.. but i was confused.. so i didnt.. haix..

den went for the concert of hannah's cell group.. organised by cor.. not bad. hahaha.. a bit.. durnoe how to say lar.. hahaha.. oh.. i went with diana and her ny frenz.. a bit ostra-ed.. but nvm.. hmm..

today.. i rem a story told from sum1 i cldnt rem.. it goes like this:
everyday, there would be an old man who threw the starfishes on the beach back into the sea.. a young man saw this and asked, "how long have u been doing this?"
the old man ans, "more than ten years.."
puzzled, the yound man asked, "but y?"
in a smile, the old man ans, "cuz when the tide gets low, the starfishes would stay on the beach, eventually dehydrated and dies.."
the young man den questioned with a tinch on sarcasm, "hmm.. but wadz the point? after u throw them back, they still wld stay on the beach the next time the tide subside.. wad purpose does it serve?"
the old man cont with his smile.. "the purpose is the process.. i just want to help as many starfish as possible.. it doesnt matter if they wld come back again.. till my laz breath, i will try to save them again and again.."
years ltr the old man died.. but the young man cont in his path...

*end*